You rock my fuzzy slippers

Because I tend to do more ranting than anything else, and because blog-lists seem to be going around like an STD (only not, because no one I know is ever going to get ANY), here is a list of ten things that would rock my socks, if I was wearing socks. But since I'm not, these things are just going to have to rock my fuzzy slippers. Woohoo!

1. Schnappi. All you poor uninitiated fools who have never seen Schnappi need to click the link, now. Somehow, this ridiculous video has made my life a better place. Probably because it was number 1 on the German charts in January 2005. It's nice to know that I'm not alone in my Schnappi-worshipping cult. There's a whole COUNTRY of people just like me (only German).

2. B-grade martial arts movies. I know, I know. They're lame and pathetic and have crappy special effects that involve flaming soccer balls. And yet. If you haven't seen Kung Fu Hustle, you're missing out on LIFE. There are evil gangsters with mass dance routines and a badass landlady whose ultimate technique is essentially screaming. And she's one of the better fighters.

3. The merlion. Also known as the Ugliest Thing To Ever Be Immortalized In Multiple Giant Statues. Somehow, I wound up getting a little plastic version of the thing from Singapore Airport when I was around five, and I've had it ever since. Currently, it's sitting on my desk, looking ugly. The only reason I love the merlion so much is because it SHOULD NOT EXIST. Kind of like me!

4. Short people. I rarely get the opportunity to feel tall at my grand height of 5' 5" when many of my friends are 5' 7" or taller. Enough said.


5. Emails. I am in constant need of human contact. If you write me, it'll make my day--and yes, I do know this is unbelieveably pathetic. Hell, my whole life is unbelieveably pathetic. I think I need some chocolate now.

6. CHOCOLATE. If you need this explained, you scare me.

7. Kotani Kinya. How can I even describe this guy? He's got the stupidest dance moves since the original video of You Spin Me Round, he looks like he's absolutely BATSHIT insane, and he's having the time of his life. He also looks like he could be a character from Kingdom Hearts, which scares me. Hell, he probably IS a character from Kingdom Hearts. It explains his fashion sense.

8. Burning puffy Cheetos. I am not a complete pyro, but I DO like burning puffy Cheetos and paper, because they burn in awesome ways. Also magnesium. At least, I think it's magnesium. The silvery stuff that burns really bright makes me happy.

9. Liquid mercury. I love shiny things!

10. My friends. Granted, they are not shiny, nor do they look awesome on fire, but they rock my fuzzy slippers nonetheless. Especially when they buy me candy.

And a super-special number 11 because I just thought of something that makes me unexplicably happy: SQUISHY PILLOWS. The ones filled with all those little beans or something that makes them SO MUCH FUN TO SQUISH. I love those things.